I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
