you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
