No awkward lesbian experiences without me
he wants to bone in the snuggie
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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