Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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