I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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