yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
