i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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