my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
