just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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