We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
