quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
