Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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