What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I have fence marks all over my body
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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