My friends, they love my intelligence
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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