did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
