i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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