Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
