She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
