So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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