I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
