I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I lost the right to judge tonight
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
