I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
