this boner is exhausting
I miss vodka workout Fridays
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
