Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
