But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
