so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
