I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
