Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
