Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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