I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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