I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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