One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
