I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
