I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You pole danced in your parka.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
