what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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