For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
