new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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