Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
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