IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
