don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
