Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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