i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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