Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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