you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
