One girl and one boy is just not enough.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
