In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
