hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
