Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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