no. you can't hotbox the world.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
