my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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